CROMAGNON (cromagnon) wrote,


after the hospital to get her checkup, my girl came over to my place and did my laundry, did dishes and straightened up... i know this is something that should make me happy and feel like im taken care of, the way men should like... in my head i know what a sweet and caring gesture this is, i know she is doing it because i made an old style lasagna dinner for her and her mom for mothers day, on top of the work i had... i know she is doing it because i spent all saturday with her and her son at little league and playing around afterward... i know it all, but i feel like something was taken away from me

i am so fiercely independent and self reliant it really feels weird... i am making a concerted effort to be part of her life and so far its going shockingly well and effortless... then she comes into my life, to treat me with the same care and respect... now suddenly i feel strange

(she has keys to my place because her old neighbors lost their house and the shelter they are staying in makes them leave during the day and they cannot ignore little kids... so i gave her keys so her and her ma can take turns coming over here when dealing with the kids becomes too much)
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